I Was the ‘Penis and Vagina’ Kid from the Arnold Schwarzenegger Comedy: A Look Back.

Arnold Schwarzenegger is rightfully celebrated as an action movie legend. Yet, in the midst of his blockbuster fame in the 1980s and 1990s, he also starred in several critically acclaimed comedies. A prime example is Kindergarten Cop, which marks its 35th anniversary this winter.

The Role and An Iconic Moment

In the classic film, Schwarzenegger embodies a tough police officer who goes undercover as a kindergarten teacher to track down a criminal. Throughout the film's runtime, the procedural element serves as a simple backdrop for Arnold to share adorable moments with his young class. Arguably the most famous involves a child named Joseph, who out of nowhere stands up and states the actor, “It's boys who have a penis, and girls get a vagina.” The Terminator deadpans, “I appreciate the insight.”

The boy behind the line was played by child star Miko Hughes. His career encompassed a character arc on Full House as the bully to the Olsen twins and the character of the child who returns in the screen translation of Stephen King’s Pet Sematary. Hughes remains active today, with a slate of movies in development. Furthermore, he is a regular on popular culture events. Not long ago shared his recollections from the production over three decades on.

Memories from the Set

Q: To begin, how old were you when you filmed Kindergarten Cop?

Miko Hughes: I believe I was four. I was the smallest of all the kids on set.

That's remarkable, I have no memory from being four. Do you have any memories from that time?

Yeah, to a degree. They're brief images. They're like visual recollections.

Do you recall how you were cast in Kindergarten Cop?

My parents, primarily my mom would take me to auditions. Often it was a mass tryout. There'd be dozens of children and we'd all just have to wait, go into the room, be in there less than five minutes, read a small part they wanted and that's all. My parents would coach me on the dialogue and then, when I became literate, that was some of the first material I was reading.

Do you have any recollection of meeting Arnold? What was your impression of him?

He was extremely gentle. He was fun. He was pleasant, which I suppose stands to reason. It would be strange if he was a dick to all the kids in the classroom, that probably wouldn't make for a positive atmosphere. He was fun to be around.

“It would be strange if he was mean to all the kids in the classroom.”

I knew he was a major movie star because my family informed me, but I had not actually watched his movies. I felt the importance — like, that's cool — but he didn't frighten me. He was merely entertaining and I only wanted to hang out with him when he had time. He was occupied, of course, but he'd occasionally joke around here and there, and we would dangle from his limbs. He'd tense up and we'd be dangling there. He was exceptionally kind. He bought every kid in the classroom a yellow cassette player, which at the time was a major status symbol. This was the must-have gadget, that funky old yellow cassette player. I listened to the Power Rangers soundtrack and the Ninja Turtles soundtrack for years on that thing on that thing. It wore out in time. I also was given a authentic coach's whistle. He had the coach whistle, and the kids all were gifted copies as well.

Do you remember your time filming as being fun?

You know, it's funny, that movie became a phenomenon. It was such a big movie, and it was an incredible opportunity, and you would think, in retrospect, I would want my memories to be of collaborating with Schwarzenegger, the legendary director, visiting Astoria, the production design, but my memories are of being a really picky eater at lunch. Like, they got everyone pizza, but I avoided pizza. All I would eat was the toppings only. Then, the original Game Boy was just released. That was the big craze, and I was proficient. I was the youngest and some of the older kids would hand me their devices to get past hard parts on games because I knew how, and I was quite pleased with myself. So, it's all youthful anecdotes.

The Line

OK, that specific dialogue, do you remember the context? Did you understand the words?

At the time, I probably didn't know what the word provocative meant, but I realized it got a reaction and it made adults laugh. I was aware it was kind of something I wasn't supposed to do, but I was given an exception in this case because it was funny.

“It was a difficult decision for her.”

How it was conceived, based on what I was told, was they hadn't finalized all the dialogue. Certain bits of dialogue were established early on, but once they had the whole cast on the set, it was more of a collaboration, but they worked on it while filming and, presumably someone in charge came to my mom and said, "There's a concept. We want Miko to say this. Are you okay with this?" My mom paused. She said, "Give me a moment, let me sleep on it" and took some time. She really wrestled with it. She said she wasn't sure, but she thought it will probably be one of the iconic quotes from the movie and history proved her correct.